Tuesday, May 29, 2012

WANTED: MIA elephant

It is a sad day. I discovered that Cordy is missing. I'm not sure if he ran away, is playing an outstanding game of hide-and-seek, or horrors was abandoned somewhere.
Have you seen him?

Cordy is roughly 11" tall, blue, and made of corduroy. And I will run around screaming, "Want Cordy" and "Cordy, where ah yoo?" until he returns.
Please help me find him.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Pop goes the...


Yeah. Maybe not quite as zesty as the original song, but...

You may recall my mentioning the splinter that stowawayed in my tushy. It yielded a 3 sticker appointment with Herr Doctor.
Marcus: 3, Dr. Hales: 0
No idea who that baby is.
Or why (s)he's eating the stethoscope.
I won that battle, as I ended up with all those stickers, and he failed to retrieve the splinter. He thought part of it came out, but in hindsight (punny!), he was mistaken.

Now we reach the juncture of this post where it gets all Choose-Your-Own Adventure on you. Things may be crossing the line into the realm of TMI. So either play it safe with option 1 or hop aboard this trainwreck with option 2...

Option 1
Dad held me down while Mom vanquished the splinter (exhibit A). It was a festive Saturday night. I am recovering nicely.

Option 2
Fast forward another 2 weeks and my tush still hadn't healed. I staunchly refused Mom's intervention offers/attempts (aside from antiseptic spray and Neosporin) -- Dr. Hales told her not to let the wound close back up. Mom effectively kicked the hornets' nest with some vigorous scrubbing one night, and, after a day of festering, I was pretty upset. Realizing that it was time to take matters into her own hands (with Dad's hands restraining me), she followed the doctor's example and popped what-had-become-a-giant-splinter-boil. First squeeze was pretty gross -- it was infected. Second squeeze yielded the shard of wood above (really, the picture doesn't do it justice*). It came shooting out like a greased log down a flume. Mom was horrified. I was shrieking. Dad was confused.
Well, that's par for the course.
(Just kidding, Dad... Besides, without your help, there wouldn't be any pictures.)
I'm doing much better (hooray!), but Mom suspects that this story may not be completely over.

 "Booboo on butt" really is fun to say. Quite the tongue twister if you say it a bunch of times really fast.

* Don't worry, we've saved it to put in this year's scrapbook. Bet you can't wait until my baby teeth start falling out.

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Mama Day

Happy Mother's Day to all my special ladies. You know who you are.
And in case you didn't get my card yet, here's a sneak preview (with outtakes).

Roses are red.

Orchids* are blue.

I love Moms.

Especially YOU!

*umm, we're taking some creative license

Saturday, May 12, 2012

N is so overrated

I have recently expanded my repertoire of party tricks to include the ABCs. It's a fabulous little ditty. Perhaps you've heard it before?
I sometimes include all the letters. Sometimes not. Mostly, I just don't like N. At least today. Today, N is a silly, superfluous letter.
Unless it's in one of these:
In which case, there are Ns AND Ms.
Yeah, you probably think that's bike rack. You and Mom are so wrong.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Going, Going, Gone

You might think I'm talking about those delicious Morning Glory Muffins Mom sent in for school yesterday, but you'd be wrong. Though they were quite delicious and they are quite gone.

Dad thinks that I might be getting assigned extra snack days because of Mom's baking. He might be right given how many people seem to be sampling the wares.
Mom snuck off to see Miss Hillary yesterday.
Mom after she dropped me off
And she looked a little different when she came back to get me:
Mom donated 10" of her hair to Locks-for-Love. Either Mom is really nice or she really is trying to create a minion army of mini-me's (or mini-her's, as the case may be). I suppose we won't know until it's too late.

 Well, maybe she really is just being nice seeing as she accepted some karma pre-payment in the morning. Mom picked up this awesome easel for me on her run*:
People throw out the darnedest things.** It's missing the rod in the center for the paper roll and needs a little work, but it's in pretty good shape. And we got it free. I mean the Royal "We" -- Mom carried that sucker home from about 1-1.5 miles away. It's not heavy, but it sure it awkward. And it was pretty amusing to a few innocent bystanders. Thankfully she didn't find a sofa, right?

* It was out with someone's trash.
 ** We might have to start checking the running route trash more regularly.